Try Something New

As a young teenager, I was deeply shaped by what it meant to have a  “personal relationship with Jesus.” I heard it talked about all the time, in every sermon and every Bible study, in every youth group message. I learned that the way to know God was through a “quiet time” where one devoted themself to studying scripture, searching for the sin in their life, asking for forgiveness, and repeating daily. This pattern was engrained in my mind and became the only allowable way to know Jesus. There wasn’t a lot of room for creativity in discovering God because anything outside of the prescription felt sacrilegious, or had potential to lead me astray into something “evil.” 

It’s interesting the deep impact those teachings had on me in those formative years. While seminary stretched my imagination for encountering God, I still found myself stuck in a loop of guilt for not doing a daily quiet time as I had learned in my primitive Christian formation in youth group. I clearly remember the moment that changed for me. 

At Truett Seminary, all students had to be part of small groups called “covenant groups” that meet weekly during the semester. Just as you grew academically in classes, covenant groups served as a way for students to grow spiritually by learning new spiritual practices, led by older seminary student mentors. Our group met regularly at Kristen’s house. She had a small condo on the Brazos River that would face Baylor’s new football stadium, had it been built in 2006. Our conversation that evening was one I can’t remember, but I left learning that God was accessible outside the “quiet time” model. I was finally given permission to seek God in additional ways that didn’t look like what I had been taught in my youth. 

Over the years since that “aha” spiritual moment”, I learned about lectio divina, (literally, “divine reading”), the practice of prayer and meditation of scripture. I practiced journaling my prayers and thoughts.  I experimented with meditation and breath work. I tried sabbath (although I am very bad at this). I prayed prayers of confession and I explored discernment.  I paid attention to the longings of my soul and allowed myself to ask questions and be brutally honest with God. Recently, I’ve been interested in the apophatic tradition of the Christian mystic tradition and the emptying of oneself to commune with God.  While no expert in any of these, the practice of being open to trying different ways of forming my soul released me from the rigid box I had been stuck in.

It was liberating to know that God does not exist in the boxes we put God in.  There is no one “right way,” no prescription or check list that you must follow in order to experience God in your life.  The only thing you MUST do, is be willing. 

In this season of advent, when the world is asking so much of you and you are barely hanging on, I hope that you can take a moment to seek God.  Break out of the box you’ve always known and try some new practice that helps you encounter our God, our God who is constantly pursuing you.  Here are a few book resources that can get you started down the road to some knew experience.  You never know how God will speak to you through these encounters!

“Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation” by Ruth Haley Barton

“Soul Feast: An Invitation to the Christian Spiritual Life,” by Marjorie Thompson

“Invitation to a Journey: A Road Map for Spiritual Formation,” by Robert Mulholland, Jr.